Wala na akong masasabi… Walang salita ang kayang idescribe kung ano ang nararamdaman ko ngayon.

Ampota.

If so, can I get off the ride now?

Yes, that is a quote from Avee.  Haha.  Moving on…

I was talking to a friend the other day, and he was complaining about this girl he was kinda courting.  Or courting, whatever.  And basically, he was telling me she’s… you know the song “Jenny” of The Click 5 (yes, I listen to some Click 5 songs, walang pakialamanan.  :P)?  She was like that.

So now I go ask him, why the heck was he pursuing this girl in the first place?  According to him, she’s smart, gorgeous, sexy… SNORE.  A lot of girls fit that category.  Anything else?  Then he drops this: it’s because he finds her a challenge, and that’s what’s keeping him pursuing her, even if, truth to tell, he’s not getting anything out of this so far, not even a little reciprocation.  He also proceeds to tell me about this woman friend he has who’s also hung up on some guy who actually likes this other girl so this woman friend has no chance whatsoever with him (for the moment, and yes, this is a really, REALLY long sentence, don’t you agree?), but because she is challenged by his resistance to her charms (I’m pretty sure she has charms, ’cause I believe all women have them, unless you’re that girl who cannot be named but is called “Silvertoes” by certain people, which means you’re really, REALLY freaking UGLY and you shouldn’t have illusions that you’re pretty and charming, because, I’m sorry, you sure as hell ain’t!), she keeps on pursuing him and is hung up on him, to the point that I think she moans about him everyday to my friend.

Now, doesn’t that get you sort of riled up?  Well, actually, two things rile me up about this story.  The two of them aren’t getting anything out of this shit, right?  Well, as a very wise friend of mine told me before, if you’re not getting anything out of it, why bother?  If all this attention is not being reciprocated, why are you bothering?  Why inconvenience yourself and look stupid and pathetic (yes, I can relate already!  stop rubbing it in!)?  People would most likely tell me that hey, if they really like the person, they should just pursue, right?  Like, it should be unconditional and stuff, and that the people pursuing shouldn’t really expect anything.

‘Kay fine, I agree… to a point only.  Because if you’re going to give me the example of Christ with unconditional love and stuff, where He just loves, and loves, well, you should read the Bible again, because when people rejected His teachings, sure, He still loved them, but He also knew when to cut His losses.  When they would throw Him out of towns, He would just shake the dust off His feet at the town exit or some such place, and move on.  He would be sad, true, but He also knew and accepted that the people weren’t listening to Him, and if they didn’t want to, He couldn’t do anything about it.  And sure, He loves us even if we sin, and He can forgive us, but only if we ask for it, or repent.  Right?  It’s not a condition.  It’s more like a cause and effect thing.  And yes, He’s very patient too, so we should be patient also, pero meron din namang judgement day sa Bible ‘di ba?  So may hangganan din ang pasensya niya.  Parang tayo.  Haha.  Wag naman sana na iba na nga ang minamahal ng tao eh mahal mo pa rin.  Or something like that.  I lost my point, but anyway, there.  People should just know when to cut their losses and move on, especially if it has been a long time already.  Accept and move on.  Don’t hate the person, just accept the fact, and that’s it.

The other thing that riles me up is… well, they’re only sticking with the person because they find it a CHALLENGE???  Are you freaking kidding me???  Not because they really like the person but because it’s a challenge???  I can kinda understand like say, the challenge of a guy charming a girl, because he wants to get into her pants/shaft her, whatever the hell you want to call it, but maybe it’s only acceptable if she knows it’s just a casual thing (I have a liberal view of pretty much anything; sue me.).  But courting someone or sticking with a guy because they find it “challenging”?  What would be the point?  For example my friend finally gets through to the girl and they become a couple.  There’s no more challenge, right?  So what happens after?  He’d probably get bored and shit and they’d break up soon after.  Not really a good reason for pursuing someone.  I mean, I asked him straight out if he really liked this girl (because I know girls USUALLY enter into relationships for the long haul), and maybe she was doing this to ascertain his sincerity.  His response?  “I could learn to really like her, and eventually love her.”

What the hell.  I don’t think he even really likes her (although maybe when he goes ballistic whenever she’s a “Jenny” says otherwise) but still… and I also asked him if it’s just a challenge, then he can stop anytime, right?  He was like he would look stupid if he did that, after doing all that effort and stuff.  So now he’s just doing this just to save face?  Totally, just totally the wrong reason.  Seriously.

So what’s the whole point of this entry?  Nothing much, it’s just a rambling entry full of rants and stuff.  Maybe it’s just… I frankly don’t know why I’m typing this when I still have so many things to do.  I must be high.  Haha.

Ah well, as we say, matanda na sila.  Bahala sila sa buhay nila.  You live and you learn.  I guess I just hope they really learn.

Feel na feel ko ang entry na ‘to no?  Haha.  Just remembering some bullshit someone told me about how no one should feel neglected in any relationship; dapat bigay lang ng bigay.  And that crap was fed to me during a difficult time of my life.  Salamat po, leche ka, wala ka rin palang silbi sa buhay ko.  Kaya pwede ka na rin mamatay.

Okay, enough of that.  Next topic!

I want to get a Wii.  Just so I can play Super Smash Brothers Brawl.  Haha.  Babaw ng dahilan.

I need money.  I just saw a bunch of stuff I wanted to buy.  Orange hoodie, nice Gola shoes… heck, if I had money I would buy new Sanuks (my old ones are poor and pathetic already), a 17-55 mm lens 2.8 for Canon, and… well, that’s it.  Although that damn lens is expensive.  Sheet.

Patience, patience, patience.  I need a hell of a lot of that.  Why am I impatient?  Sucks.

Yay, money coming in.  Woohoo.  Tapos gagastusin lahat.  Booo.

I keep forgetting what I’m supposed to be talking about here.  Pwe.

Ang dumi na ng screen ng aking laftof.  Shet.

Oh wait, now I remember.  It’s just that Mercy by Duffy is so fun to listen to.  Haha.

Anyway, if you go to Megamall, Building A, basement level Food Court, near Jollibee, you’ll see a new food cart there, Chef Chow’s Shabu-shabu Express.  Since it’s new, there will be balloons (unless they removed it already) and tarps.  Big-ass tarps.  And food photos all over the cart.  And all those food photos are by me!  ME!!!  Heehee.  Something I did is in a mall!  Of course, nobody’s gonna know unless someone reads this, I tell them, or whatever, but I don’t care.  Something I shot is being used…. Wow, what a feeling.  Like my heart was swelling or something when I first saw it last Saturday…

Oh, and eat there too!  Don’t just look at the photos, by damn.  Masarap naman eh.  :D  Promise.  I like ate there twice already.  Wahaha.  It’s good!  And I’m not even a noodle fan.

After all these months, a lot of realizations finally came to him.  They came to him out of the blue while he was staring out of the bus window.

No wonder she kept mentioning that she might be migrating to another country, and kept badgering him about it.  What were his responses?

He ignored her.

He didn’t want to talk about it.

He would get annoyed.

She would shut up about it but soon bring it up again anyway.  Which led to the cycle repeating itself over and over again.

And just this day, he realized it: she kept hinting that she was leaving because she wanted to see his reaction to that idea.  Would he beg her to stay?  Would he say he would go with her because he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her?  Would he tell her to go and break up with her?

None of those reactions came about.  But the truth was, he was freaked out about it, and just didn’t want to deal with it.  Especially when she brought up the subject of him going with her.  He kept shooting that idea down.  He thought he was just being practical; after all, what would he do there, live with her family?  He knew he had a future here.  Why ruin it?  And they were so young!  Getting married already?  Heck, he barely had enough money to support himself.  What about a whole family?  Was she effing crazy?

The whole issue was then pretty much buried under whatever, because she became busy, and he became a pathetic something-or-other she barely paid attention to.

Then one day, he got blindsided by discovering someone was wooing her.  And wouldn’t you know it, she was totally attracted to this other guy.  Soon enough, she dumped him.  After all, this new guy, heck, he could give her a future.  He was willing to commit to something, to a future for the two of them.  He was older, and established in his career already.  In other words, the new guy was the total opposite of him.  And that cost him… well, her.  Not that it was the right way of dealing with it-she didn’t exactly talk to him about it, or about anything, or tell him anything-but what could he do?  It was done.  They were over.

And now all of a sudden, he was now Mr. I’m-Ready-to-Settle-Down-Now and Mr. I-Want-a-Committment.

He shook his head, and chuckled at the irony of it all.

I’ve been reading some blogs talking about the MRT, like Dodge’s and Joem’s, so I decided to write about my own MRT experience.  Haha.

Like them I also rely on the MRT to get around quickly.  Even if it’s kind of a walk from my house to the MRT Ortigas station, I take it anyway.  It’s great exercise.  Haha.  And I don’t exactly have a choice.  And even if I had a car, gasoline prices today are ugh.

I love the MRT.  But I don’t love the people riding the train.  People who assume, and people who have no good manners in their damn bones.

Like this woman na panget.  I was behind her in the line, and I was rummaging through my messenger bag, which was in front of me, and apparently, touching her butt, because she suddenly turned around and started shooting a death look at me.  I ignored her for a few moments, but when she continued to stare at me, I asked her what was up.  She goes, “‘Yung kamay mo nasa pwet ko na!”  Incredulous, I go show her my bag, and that I wasn’t even touching her goddamn ass.  That was the first time someone has ever accused me of that.  It was crap.  At pangit siya!  Hello!  Pero kahit maganda siya, di ko pa rin gagawin yun di ba.  It just ain’t right.

Another horrible experience I’ve had was trying to get off the Ayala Station during rush hours.  I’m pretty sure every one has experienced trying to ride the train at Ayala Station around these hours only to feel frustrated because he or she can’t get in the jampacked train.  Well imagine how frustrating it is to not be able to GET OUT of the goddamn train.  All because of these people rushing to get inside, like they’d get left behind or something.

It’s common courtesy to let people get off the damn train first before getting on, right?  I always make sure to do that, because I want to be courteous to my fellow passengers and hope that that courtesy be returned to me.  No such luck.  Heck, this is the Philippines!  The country of very courteous and nice people!  Yup, we are… to visitors and foreigners.  Our own countrymen can go to hell.

So there I was, following someone outside the train.  He got out, but for some reason, the crowd couldn’t just wait for me to get out as well.  They started pushing inward, and I got pushed back in.  Puta, bastusan na pala eh.  I started throwing elbows and pushing forward again.  I guess someone got pissed off because I felt a punch land on my back.  It was something to laugh at (hindi malakas, haha XD) but it was a punch nonetheless.  Bakit sila pa ang galit?  Sila na nga ang bastos. Hey, sounds family.  Sila na nga ang mali, sila pa ang galit.  Like people who get towed because they parked in “No Parking” areas, people who get stopped because they’re speeding or running the red light, or people who stab people in the back but expect the same people to support them anyway.  Mga Pinoy talaga.

Mas weird pa diyan eh paakyat na ako ng stairs when this random person going down the stairs na kasalubong ko suddenly says to me, “You see, you can hurt someone.”  Di ko siya pinansin at di ko na tiningnan ang muhka niya, pero WHERE THE HECK DID THAT COME FROM???

Good thing mabait ako and that I was rushing.  Otherwise, I’d probably have elbowed him too.

So there, the MRT rules (unless it’s delayed or breaks down) but the people riding it… well, if only killing weren’t against the law.  Haha.  Cause them peoples are a waste of space.

As mentioned, that was like the longest 1 hour of my life.  Or one of them.

Ranchero, according to the program, was supposed to tackle the role of food in prison.  Was it to keep the prisoners alive?  Or was food actually an instrument of torture for the inmates because in keep them alive, they are forced to endure prison life until the time they are released.  What if they want to die already?

Sounds intriguing doesn’t it?  That’s why this is the one we watched, not the other one.  Wrong move.

I don’t know if I lack film theory concepts, or I can’t appreciate art, or both, or whatever, but I didn’t like it.  Why, you ask?  oh, so many reasons.

Where to start?  Huh… Hmm… Well, what the hell is with the uber long takes man?  I can appreciate long takes.  You know, that people are acting with no cuts for so many minutes, and how the camera doesn’t shake and everything, and I guess they wanted to present the point that prison life is BOOOORING.  I’m guessing, okay?  I don’t know the motivation for that.  But come on.  Do you really have to show long takes for a guy waking up, and about 10 minutes washing his face, pissing, and walking around?  Or the cooking or something?  Daymn.  Like Jana said, 10 hours na ng sine wala pa rin siyang ginagawang bago!

Okay there, it was dragging.  Speaking of Jana, like 20 minutes into the movie, after sleeping, she left.  She couldn’t take it.

What else?  Oh, ang labo nung kwento eh!  Bwiset.  Hindi natakeup yung role nung food sa preso, siryoso.  ‘Yung issue na lang biglang may nawawalang kutsilyo, tapos maya-maya may nagriot na, tapos may namatay, at andoon pala yung nawawalang kutsilyo.  So wait… una, how did the cops know that a knife was missing?  Two, how did the guy with the knife get the knife???  Three, guys were just fighting over basketball.  How did everyone get involved?  Or why did everyone just suddenly storm out of church to join in the fight?  That’s so weird!  Oh, and after the riot, they just showed the main guy, sitting, for maybe around 5 more minutes, and then… the end.  Oooookay.

And the sounds!  The sounds of metal were way too loud!  It’s like they put lapels everywhere!  It was so unnatural.

And well, I guess I just really didn’t get the whole point of the movie.  Like Ambo said, it felt like they just wanted to make it a feature-length film or something, that’s why they used plenty of long takes.

I saw Sir Doy again after watching the film.  I was tempted to go ask him what he thought of the film but then he might say he found it good and well-crafted, mapapahiya lang ako.  Huwag na lang.  XD

Maybe I should just watch another film.  Nang matuwa naman ako sa Cinemalaya.  haha.  Except for Pepot Artista, di pa uli ako natutuwa sa mga napapanood ko doon.  XD

Was supposed to catch the 6:15 pm thingy of shorts or something like that with the works of Sir Doy, Sir Groyon, Jason Moll, and Macky Quimson being shown.  I came from a shoot near Ateneo.  Go figure.  Anyway, arrived in Taft area a little past 6, and fortunately, Ambo and Jana were still at Taft Towers waiting for JT to arrive from wherever he was coming from.

(Preceding conversation notes are now like, um, parphrased, ‘kay???  Totally not verbatim.  YAY!)

Me: (upon my arrival, sporting my Zara hoodie-yes, it must be mentioned, diva!- I wave)
Ambo and Jana: Muhka kang anime!
Me: Yes.  So, bakit andito pa rin kayo?  Sinong inaantay natin?
Ambo: JT.  Kukai’s boyfriend when she’s here, my bitch when she’s not.
Me: So, asaan na siya?
Ambo: Navaricose veins na kami dito kakaantay!
Jana: 20 minutes na kaya kami dito!

In short, they do not know.  So antay kami.  May mamang dumaan na may belt bag.

Jana: JT, ikaw ba ‘yan?  Wag ka na magpanggap!
(laughter)

While waiting, Ambo calls Mars, inviting her to come join us in our viewing of Cinemalaya.  She declines or some such thing, cause she and John are going elsewhere.  O sige.  XD  And, uh, we discuss more stuff, and more stuff, and more stuff, and more stuff, and more…

Me: Kasama si Anna Manalapas?  I haven’t met her yet.
Ambo: Ay si Anna.  Nako, wag ka mag-alala.  Mag (toooot!) pa kami sa harap mo.
Me: (raises eyebrow)

He finally arrives, his hair now short.  Jana, in her haste to finally get to CCP, suggests we get a cab; fortunately, one stops in front of us, and we flag it down, and  we pile in the taxi.   We talk about a lot of things in the  cab.

Ambo: Nagtuturo na ako sa PNU!
Me: Ng ano?
Ambo: May Philosophy, may economics.
Me: Economics???  The hell??

Ambo: It’s like that thing with this thing, where, okay na sana, biglang Bible Study.
Me: What’s wrong with Bible Study?
Ambo: Wala naman, pero baka (I forgot what the hell he was saying)
Jana: Hindi mo ba alam, si Ambo ang sumulat ng original Bible.
Me: Ah yes.

Ambo makes a motion towards JT.

Me: Hinalikan mo ba???
Ambo: Hindi no!
Me: Jana, palit nga tayo.
Jana: Bakit?
Me: Di ko matake ang kadiring pangyayari dito sa likod.
Ambo: Bakit, wala naman kaming ginagawang kababuyan ah.  Meron ba baby?
Jt: Wala naman.

More things are discussed, including Lakangiting Garcia, ARTAPRE, and “Heal our Land”.  Do not ask me to explain this Heal our Land phenomenon.  Please see Mr. Rondera for more details.  Ahem.  Moving on.

Finally arrive at CCP, where we meet up with Anna Manlapas and her sister Patty.  I am finally introduced to her.  She now has black hair, not like in Hired where her hair was red.  Anyway.

We decide on what to watch, since we didn’t make abot nga the 6:15 pm thingy.

Me: Paano ba ‘to?  Labo ng schedule eh.
Ambo: Parang EAF lang ‘yan!  Ito o.  9 am, PEDANCE.  3:15 naman, ibang subject.
Jana: (random subject name) naman pag ganyang oras.
Me: Ah.

We line up and buy tickets.

Anna: Si Patty na yung pabili natin ng tickets.  Siya kasi student.
Ambo: Bakit, ako din naman student ah!

He proceeds to buy 3 tickets at student price.  Me too, but only 1 ticket.  Haha.  Oh yeah, we decided to watch Ranchero, because it was intriguing on the schedule: “What is the role of food in a prison?  To feed the prisoners to keep them alive?  Or to torture the prisoners who just want to die already?”  O di ba, intriguing!

But since it was way too early, we go to Harbor Square.

Me: Saan tayo kakain?  Sa mura ha.
Everybody else: Oo nga.
Jana: Eh di sa Jollibee!!!
Everybody else: O nga no!

We go in, grab a table, and only Jana goes over to the counter to order.

Jana: Hey, come let’s join us na kaya (to us).

I join her.  More chikahan in line, and in the table.

Me: (to Anna) di ba your mom works for (company)?
Anna: Sino ka???  Paano mo alam ‘yon???
Jana: Stalker!
Me: Oh, you know (proceeds to tell whole story)

Ambo: Bakit lasang isda yung fries ko?  O yung pangfishball??

Jana: Ambo, pahingi fries ha.
Ambo: Sige.
Jana: (reaches for fries, puts one in mouth)
Ambo: isa dalawang piso!
Jana: (pauses) ay, buo pa naman eh.  Babalik ko na lang.

Ambo reaches for JT’s pineapple juice.

Ambo: sarap ng pineapple ng Jollibee!  (to JT) I recommend it.  Orderin mo.

After eating, we all go out, and make tambay-tambay near the water.  Manila Bay is so pretty.  At night at least.  Then we all get our palms read.  It’s almost 9, so we start walking back to CCP.  At the entrance is a grotesque creature.  It looks like a girl, but we’re not sure if it’s even a human being.

Anna: Ambo, basahin mo kamay ko.
Ambo: Teka lang, nadidistract ako!  (makes sound effects-imagine “Help me!” moans)
Jana and me: (laughing our asses off)
Ambo: Noel, gawa tayo sine sa susunod.  Pangalan eh “Bangungot”.
Me: Starring (you know who!  Clue: Seton)?
Ambo: Oo!
Me: Siya ‘yung bangungot ano?  Dapat ikaw yung co-star niya.

We go inside for less distractions.  Inside, I see Carlos Armas and Jason.  I amble over, say hello.

Me: (to Jason) sayang, di ko naabutan film mo.
Jason: ako nga din eh!

Haha.  Film mo ‘yon loko.  XD  Hindi mo kailangan abutan.

I go back over to Ambo and the rest of the other people.  Muhkang patapos pa lang ang showing.  We sit down and the place gets hotter as more people exit the viewing area.  Blech.  so much for the hoodie, yeah?  I spot Mr. Groyon sporting new glasses and new hair(?), with a brown jacket, and… slacks?  Basta, hindi jeans.  I would have said hi, but he was always talking to someone else, and I did not want to be rude.  Also spotted Mr. Mike Lim, and Sir Doy.

I also spot food, and wonder, pwede kaya kami kumuha diyan?  Meanwhile, Ambo continues with the palm reading.  More people exit.  I see Caby, Diane, and Ivan.  Also see Meg.  I also spot a hell of a lot of people with DSLRs.  Bakit ba naging uso ‘yon?

I spot R.A. and Rona.  Rona is now super thin. 

I also see Eric Siy, and he asks for Tanya’s number, which fortunately for him, I have.  Fortunately it’s Sun, so you know, they can make tawag and I won’t care.  Haha.  XD  I also see Tina Baron and we wave at each other.

Spot Jamie, Den, Char, and Crissy.  Jamie wears all black with a GG bag (ano bang brand ‘yung G tapos baliktad na G?  Basta, sosyal siya!).  Den was wearing… I forgot, but I remember thinking it was cool.  Char wearing pink shirt, jeans.  Crissy wears a white top (I think) with green pants and red Chucks, and sports make-up tonight.  Hhhmm!  (bakit ko bigla namention ang damit?  Hendi ko rin alam!  XD)

Sidebar:

Me: Nakita niyo na sina Crissy?

Ambo: Is it just me, or did she become hotter?  (Yes, I swear he said that.)

I amble over and wave hi.

Jamie: Hello Manu.
Crissy: (waves) Hello!
Den: (big, surprised smile)
Char: (mumbles) Nice hair (and then walks away).
Me: So, maganda ba?
Crissy: Hindi ka ba nanood?
Me: hindi, late na nga kami eh.
Crissy: Bakit hindi???  Dapat pinanood mo kahit kay Sir Doy lang!

Wander off, Jamie is now talking with sina Ambo and Jana.  Jana is showing her moles.  Don’t ask me why.

Me: O Jamie, bakit sosyal-sosyal ata itsura mo ngayon?  Ganyan pa bag mo!
Jamie: You owe me a bag!
Me: (sa loob-loob, walang hiya to ah! XD) Wala pa eh.  Haha.

Jamie has to go soon, but Ambo makes her go look at some ugly girl first before she leaves.  She does, and leaves laughing.

We hang around the lobby just waiting for the movie.

Ambo: (to Patty) (something to do with guys)
Me: Laro tayo game.  Turo ka ng lalaki na gusto mo, tapos lalapitan ko.  Sasabihin ko “hi.  Have you met Patty?” Tapos aalis na ako.
Patty: (laughs)

Me: Jana, gusto mo maglaro ng game?
Jana: anong game?
Me: (explains game)
Jana: Hoy, umayos ka nga!

We finally get to the movie.  The movie starts.  This is Ranchero BTW.

Jana: 10 hours na yung movie para lang ipakita na gumigising yung mama?  Ano ba ‘yan!!!

For more details, see next blog entry.  XD

Jana can’t take it anymore, she leaves.  We finish the movie.  A 1 hour movie.  too short for a full-length, but felt too long nevertheless.  That was like one of the longest hours of my life.  URGH.

After that, we just listen to the band playing outside, and we go home after.  Yay.

Fun night.  Parang class reunion.  Wahaha.

Nawala na ‘yung momentum ko.  On to panlalait sa Ranchero!

(Sorry Josh, very appropriate lang kasi yung title.  Haha.  XD)

(No, this entry has nothing to do with Mr. Relativo, just the title. Ahem.)

I wish some people, before spouting off their stupid mouths, would actually take a while to THINK, and DISCOVER certain things before saying stupid things that aren’t true.

Ako?  AKO???  Ako, gagawa nun?  What the eff men.  I don’t waste my time on that shit.  Kung galit ako, galit ako.  Pero di ako gagawa ng ganun!  Excuse me.

Bakit ako iisipin niyo?  Akala ko ba kilala niyo na ako.  Tapos iisipin niyo bigla ako ‘yon?

Umayos nga kayo.  Nananahimik na nga ako dito eh.  Mga bwiset.  Please don’t threaten me either, because, like I said, I ain’t doin anything.  Thank you.

Apparently, I’ve been setting myself up for “pathetic-ness”.

Interesting.  And, if it’s really what it is, unfortunately, true.

Yup.  I need a life.

Can Wednesday come here already?